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Post by Nikki the Great on Feb 28, 2022 3:10:53 GMT
Dave Lister must be cancelled!Yes that’s right folks, we’re doing this now. So after the recent shenanigans on here that landed us in some seriously steamy water, with warning banners being issued to those of us who were behaving like ANIMALS, I was thinking we must find a way to put this right. So if cancel culture is the thing you all want, then cancel culture better be ready to clean up the mess Dave Lister has been making since he blagged his way into space. Because now we’re ALL about the cancellation of HRH Problematic Prince, hero of creepers and layabouts. So here’s how I envision this working. We all rewatch (unless you’re one of them folks who commit it all to memory and therefore know it off by heart), starting from S1E1. Then we all add our observations of the terrible things Lister has gotten away with for far too long. Then we move onto episode 2 etc etc. We must work together to cancel him guys. We’ve got this. #canceldavelister and stop this monster from ever appearing on tv again. So Underdunn and I watched tonight and I’m sure he’ll add his thoughts soon. But here’s mine for: S1E1: The EndLister is bored and he expresses this by making Rolf Harris (probably his hero) noises at Rimmer, who is just trying to do his job. As usual, Lister thinks other people are merely puppets that he uses for his own personal entertainment. What a dick. Lister takes Rimmer’s half consumed soup and gulps it on down his throat in one go. It saves him rooting through the bins later. Dave would definitely not be opposed to eating discarded snacks at say...a cinema for example. That is, if he didn’t use the cinema as a prime spot to put his unwelcome mit upon various unsuspecting female thighs under the cover of darkness. Ugh. Lister completely unashamedly shoves a lit cigarette in his waxy ear then stuffs it back in his gob. Lister is gross. Rimmer pours his heart out to Lister and tells him how hard it is to work his way up in this place and him being him. Lister bullies him for this, dubbing it pointless. Why wouldn’t Rimmer just want to lop about in his cum encrusted bunk like Lister does? Lister happily tears down other people’s work and sneers at those who make any effort beyond what he does on a daily basis, ie eating, talking shit with his mouth full, scratching his nuts and making Rimmer smell it and ogling women like fresh produce. Lister is a disgrace. Lister physically assaults Rimmer on his way to a funeral. Wow Lister, you sure pick your moments for your mindless violence, don’t you? At the funeral Lister sets about attempting to humiliate a man who spoke little English by messing about with some grubby coins he fished out of a dirty old fountain once when he was trying to scrape enough together for the night bus fare after drinking himself into yet another drunken stupor where he polluted everyone’s personal space with his gross behaviour, probably involving fondling a woman he didn’t know the name of. Disgusting. Lister lights up another cigarette, this time in bed, unbothered about the fire risk that comes from doing that, because he is simply unbothered about endangering the lives of anyone else on board, even his own useless self. You suck, Lister. Lister has snuck an animal on board that could not consent to being there. He probably wants to fuck it. He probably has already. It’s probably pregnant due to him. This is unforgivable, Dave. Lister letches all over Kochanski, invading her personal space without asking, like he usually does to anyone and anything. She is slightly amused by this loaf trying to get off with her and brushes him off in good humour. Brushes him off. As in NEVER CONSENTS to his constant plotting to resurrect her so he can screw her. Smh. Lister then blabs some nonsense about how he wants to become king of a feral cat colony or some shit, so he’s shoved into a cupboard to save everyone else listening to his garbage, but turns out all that did was save the wrath of Dave Lister for millions of years, but not eliminate it. Damn. Lister repeatedly asks Holly to confirm all the people who hated him are dead, before slipping straight into creeper mode and rambling on about how he’s gonna force Kochanski into marriage. Smooth. When Rimmer’s hologram appears, Lister taunts it for never having “interfered with a woman sexually”. This is because Dave Lister is the king of interfering with a woman sexually and he’s proud of this. He adds the cherry to the top of his cake of douchery by mocking a dead man for being dead. Good grief! Lister is intimidated by a creature with better personal hygiene than him. Holly explains Cat is a product of Dave’s cat shagging tomfoolery. Lister tries to serve Cat his dinner on the floor, cos that’s how Lister prefers to eat all his meals, because Lister is gross. Then he happily trashes Cat’s belief system by boasting about how he put his willy in that one cat that started Cat’s race and is therefore the feral cat king he dreamed of being, which he celebrates, leaving a horrified Cat to come to terms with the fact his very existence came about due to Dave Lister using an animal who couldn’t consent for his sexual gratification. That’s nasty Lister. You nasty. Lister must be stopped. Lister MUST be cancelled.
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Adam
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Post by Adam on Feb 28, 2022 11:06:08 GMT
He ate loads of dead people too.
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Post by gavinfinner on Feb 28, 2022 11:11:16 GMT
Yum dead people LOL!
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Post by Underdunn on Feb 28, 2022 11:25:57 GMT
Cheers Gavin. Yeah one thing Nikki the Great has missed out on is his disgustingly racist and imperialist attitude towards CAT, which I found genuinely shocking upon rewatch. Despite only having been awake for about 5 minutes, he sees another person and instead of assuming that perhaps another member of the crew survived he runs in terror, presumably because its a black man in a pink suit and he therefore assumes it's a dangerous pimp. Upon discovering that this is actually the result of 3 million years of evolution he IMMEDIATELY claims ownership of the individual, tries to force him to eat off the floor in order to show respect to his new master and then informs him that he's taking him to a farm on fiji where he will be forced to work underwater. And we used to let children watch this show? Dave Lister MUST be cancelled.
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Smurfy
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Post by Smurfy on Feb 28, 2022 12:35:48 GMT
Looking forward to reading this Freeborn-essay, Nik. Also this sounds like a fun activity to chat, doesn't it?
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Post by Underdunn on Feb 28, 2022 13:17:34 GMT
Looking forward to reading this Freeborn-essay, Nik. Also this sounds like a fun activity to chat, doesn't it? It's a fun activity in chat and beyond! Any more examples of disgusting cancel-worthy behaviour in the very first episode?
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Post by Nikki the Great on Feb 28, 2022 13:31:11 GMT
Looking forward to reading this Freeborn-essay, Nik. Also this sounds like a fun activity to chat, doesn't it? Freeborn’s would’ve included some smug shit about how great he is cos he’s doing an Open University degree in his 40’s instead of being employed, cos Freeborn knows way more about life than any of us and has been through more than any of us ever has cos life truly sucks when you just wanna sit around all day, judging everyone else and telling them how they should think and act and nobody listens. Poor poor Freeborn :’(
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Post by Nikki the Great on Feb 28, 2022 13:38:48 GMT
So HOW I ENVISION THIS WORKING is EVERYONE rewatch episode 1. Or remember it. Whatever you want to do. I can’t do watch alongs myself when the dialogue is important cos there’s no subtitles thanks to Lister pulling the plug on them (dick), so I am rewatching and taking notes. You all do the same. Maybe eventually it’ll evolve into something else, but for now I’m visioning this thread as basically an episode by episode think tank that you can either write your thoughts/review of in article form, like I kinda did in a very slap-dash way, or you can do it your own way. It can be longer or shorter than mine, cover the same stuff I did or other stuff. It could be BEAUTIFUL and it could definitely be a step in the right direction in bringing this beast to justice.
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Post by Underdunn on Feb 28, 2022 14:25:34 GMT
So HOW I ENVISION THIS WORKING is EVERYONE rewatch episode 1. Or remember it. Whatever you want to do. I can’t do watch alongs myself when the dialogue is important cos there’s no subtitles thanks to Lister pulling the plug on them (dick), so I am rewatching and taking notes. You all do the same. Maybe eventually it’ll evolve into something else, but for now I’m visioning this thread as basically an episode by episode think tank that you can either write your thoughts/review of in article form, like I kinda did in a very slap-dash way, or you can do it your own way. It can be longer or shorter than mine, cover the same stuff I did or other stuff. It could be BEAUTIFUL and it could definitely be a step in the right direction in bringing this beast to justice. Exactly, is there any more questionable behaviour from Lister in 'The End'? He certainly brags about outranking the mice onboard and even mocks them by doing a sarcastic impression of them saluting him. Lister it seems is always keen on enslaving animals and would appear to actually get off on it. Also he shows not so much as a single tear for the death of all his close friends and even the woman he's currently stalking. Remember that from his point of view he only saw them all that morning, now they're dead and he couldn't even give a toss. Quite frankly I'm surprised he didn't just whip out his dong and start jacking off in Kochanski's ash pile - I mean he'd already half eaten Petersons and then just brushed the rest on the floor, respecting corpses isn't really his forte.
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Post by Nikki the Great on Feb 28, 2022 14:49:38 GMT
I’m surprised he didn’t roll them into another cig to use them to poke about in his scuzzy ears with.
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 2, 2022 21:48:16 GMT
Forgot to add that Lister correctly refers to himself as slime in this episode.
So in light of everything that’s going on around these parts lately - ie that shocking and very serious revelation about someone we knew in the RD fan community that we’ve been talking about in the private section, not Johnny Patch-Knees Capps (hehehehe) throwing a wobbler cos a pic he uploaded for the world to see ended up here (but improved) and then took the obvious bait and complained to the manager about us AGAIN, proving once again the point we’ve been making forever about how they lurk around here reporting us STILL hahaha, (yet apparently they never visit here) and of course the very exciting changes and plans for the future of our little outcast community (You are all pirates), I think I’m gonna just leave this now til after I’m back from the London meetings I mentioned, ie Wednesday next week(ish). As in I’m probably not going to move onto episode 2 til at least after that I don’t think, cos it means actually taking the time to watch gross old Dave molest his way through space.
So if you have anything else to add then do so OR if you’re ahead of me and want to start episode 2, then you’re welcome to do that, but I’m thinking maybe if each episode is left up for at least a week for everyone to discuss (should they wish to or have time to) cos obviously other commitments and stuff for most of us and standing with the Iranians even though it’s the Ukrainians who are being attacked and making the entire thing about pronouns whilst insisting it’s everyone else making it about pronouns or whatever silly minor issue the silly neckbeards wanna get into a state over now.
Anyway that’s all now k bai see you in the private section aka the pirate section, arrrr!
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Post by Golden Gaytime on Mar 9, 2022 19:48:17 GMT
I think that Chris Barrie doesn't need his remaining balding hair. Bring on Brynner Rimmer ;)
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 9, 2022 21:18:48 GMT
I think that Chris Barrie doesn't need his remaining balding hair. Bring on Brynner Rimmer Tbh if the actor Chris Barrie took that wig he wears off, then the character Dave Lister would have his johnson straight in it, because Dave Lister is gross and cannot stop himself
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Post by Underdunn on Mar 11, 2022 10:37:14 GMT
SERIES ONE - EPISODE TWO - "FUTURE ECHOES"
Yesterday we watched the second episode of Red Dwarf 'Future Echoes' to see if there were any further reasons to cancel the character. I had hoped that there had just been teething problems with episode 1 and in fact Lister would now emerge as the 'good and kind man' that us in the fan community had always tried to see him as...
...unfortunately not, if anything he's even worse in this one.
Very little time has passed since Lister discovered every single person he ever cared about has died horrifically, so naturally this episode begins with him riding about on a tricycle whilst singing happily to himself, prior to openly laughing at a machine with a speech impediment.
As you probably recall from last episode, Lister took ownership of the previously free and independent 'Cat' within seconds of laying his greedy eyes on him. Cat still seems to be under the throes of his new master now and is soon forced to look at Lister's boring photo-album. Lister brags about meeting some sports star or other the Cat has never heard of, before showing him a photograph of said sportstar looking like he'd rather be standing next to Hitler than this sleazy scumbag.
There is another photograph in the album that CLEARLY shows Dave Lister himself dragging up as an old woman, presumably to gain access to vulnerable patients in a nursing home or something. Of course Lister immediately lies and claims that's his grandma, before suddenly calling Rimmer gay for having a womans haircut. Just as Rimmer is reeling from this unprovoked and hypocritcal attack, Lister then decides now is the best time to inform him that he's planning on killing him again so that he can go and have another 3 million year nap. Surprisingly Lister does tell his new possession 'cat' that he can come and nap with him, but makes it VERY clear to him he can't bring any clothes. I think we all know what this 3 million year nap is REALLY going to entail, Cat's probably going to emerge from statis in a similar condition to a Barrymore victim.
Fortunately for Rimmer and Cat they have a stay of execution/buggery when the ship starts travelling through light-speed and generating something called 'future echoes'. Lister doesn't understand what a future echo is and shouts at a toaster that tries to politely explain it to him. Whilst the others attempt to work out what to do, Lister mopes about with his hands in pockets, furious that he can't move forward with his plan to re-murder his already dead bunk mate and then rape his own 'pet' in his sleep.
Rimmer witnesses Lister dying a horrible, horrible death through one of the future echoes. Lister quickly decides he actually doesn't like it when people die after all and for once doesn't just start cheerfully singing to himself at the prospect. No, instead Lister decides to try and save his own life by attacking the cat and smashing his tooth out. It's a plan as stupid as he is and he soon discovers that it has no baring at all on the completely unconnected explosion that is supposed to kill him. A fact that even a household object like a toaster could have worked out.
Lister is now scared and upset, he mourns for all the sex he won't be able to have if he dies. Rimmer notices a photograph on the wall that seems to show Lister with a couple of babies. Lister denies every seeing the photograph before, an excuse he has doubtless used multiple times before when anyone ever checks his laptop hard-drive. In this instance though there is no noncery involved, this photograph is actually one of the 'future echoes' and Lister is immediately excited again when he realises he will get to have sex at least one more time before his death, though he would ideally still like to avoid the latter part of that. Since his plan to cheat death by beating up the Cat failed he decides the next best course of action is to wear a hat and carry a baseball bat around. When Rimmer asks him to explain the logic of that, he says he fully intends to rip the nipples off 'death', having never quite understood that death is state-of-being, not a physical person. Presumably most of Lister's education came from watching Bill & Ted's bogus journey. Rimmer politely chooses not correct that, or indeed to ask how a baseball bat could be used to rip off nipples.
Lister goes to the place where he is supposed to die, anxious to get his hands on those deathly nipples, only to discover that the explosion never happens and he survives. He is briefly confused by this, but fortunately for him the only person he ever actually listens to turns up to explain it... That person is of course him from the future, he informs him that the 'horrible violent death' Rimmer witnessed was never him, but actually his son.
Lister is thrilled. Rimmer does try to point out to him that this means the son he hasn't even had yet is destined to live a short life with a horrific, painful and violent end. Lister remains thrilled and looks forward to having sex.
Dave Lister MUST be cancelled.
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 11, 2022 12:32:41 GMT
Yesterday we watched the second episode of Red Dwarf 'Future Echoes' to see if there were any further reasons to cancel the character. I had hoped that there had just been teething problems with episode 1 and in fact Lister would now emerge as the 'good and kind man' that us in the fan community had always tried to see him as... ...unfortunately not, if anything he's even worse in this one. Very little time has passed since Lister discovered every single person he ever cared about has died horrifically, so naturally this episode begins with him riding about on a tricycle whilst singing happily to himself, prior to openly laughing at a machine with a speech impediment. As you probably recall from last episode, Lister took ownership of the previously free and independent 'Cat' within seconds of laying his greedy eyes on him. Cat still seems to be under the throes of his new master now and is soon forced to look at Lister's boring photo-album. Lister brags about meeting some sports star or other the Cat has never heard of, before showing him a photograph of said sportstar looking like he'd rather be standing next to Hitler than this sleazy scumbag. There is another photograph in the album that CLEARLY shows Dave Lister himself dragging up as an old woman, presumably to gain access to vulnerable patients in a nursing home or something. Of course Lister immediately lies and claims that's his grandma, before suddenly calling Rimmer gay for having a womans haircut. Just as Rimmer is reeling from this unprovoked and hypocritcal attack, Lister then decides now is the best time to inform him that he's planning on killing him again so that he can go and have another 3 million year nap. Surprisingly Lister does tell his new possession 'cat' that he can come and nap with him, but makes it VERY clear to him he can't bring any clothes. I think we all know what this 3 million year nap is REALLY going to entail, Cat's probably going to emerge from statis in a similar condition to a Barrymore victim. Fortunately for Rimmer and Cat they have a stay of execution/buggery when the ship starts travelling through light-speed and generating something called 'future echoes'. Lister doesn't understand what a future echo is and shouts at a toaster that tries to politely explain it to him. Whilst the others attempt to work out what to do, Lister mopes about with his hands in pockets, furious that he can't move forward with his plan to re-murder his already dead bunk mate and then rape his own 'pet' in his sleep. Rimmer witnesses Lister dying a horrible, horrible death through one of the future echoes. Lister quickly decides he actually doesn't like it when people die after all and for once doesn't just start cheerfully singing to himself at the prospect. No, instead Lister decides to try and save his own life by attacking the cat and smashing his tooth out. It's a plan as stupid as he is and he soon discovers that it has no baring at all on the completely unconnected explosion that is supposed to kill him. A fact that even a household object like a toaster could have worked out. Lister is now scared and upset, he mourns for all the sex he won't be able to have if he dies. Rimmer notices a photograph on the wall that seems to show Lister with a couple of babies. Lister denies every seeing the photograph before, an excuse he has doubtless used multiple times before when anyone ever checks his laptop hard-drive. In this instance though there is no noncery involved, this photograph is actually one of the 'future echoes' and Lister is immediately excited again when he realises he will get to have sex at least one more time before his death, though he would ideally still like to avoid the latter part of that. Since his plan to cheat death by beating up the Cat failed he decides the next best course of action is to wear a hat and carry a baseball bat around. When Rimmer asks him to explain the logic of that, he says he fully intends to rip the nipples off 'death', having never quite understood that death is state-of-being, not a physical person. Presumably most of Lister's education came from watching Bill & Ted's bogus journey. Rimmer politely chooses not correct that, or indeed to ask how a baseball bat could be used to rip off nipples. Lister goes to the place where he is supposed to die, anxious to get his hands on those deathly nipples, only to discover that the explosion never happens and he survives. He is briefly confused by this, but fortunately for him the only person he ever actually listens to turns up to explain it... That person is of course him from the future, he informs him that the 'horrible violent death' Rimmer witnessed was never him, but actually his son. Lister is thrilled. Rimmer does try to point out to him that this means the son he hasn't even had yet is destined to live a short life with a horrific, painful and violent end. Lister remains thrilled and looks forward to having sex. Dave Lister MUST be cancelled. I actually feel sick. Mostly by dodgy Dave’s antics, but also cos I’m getting anal about this beautiful piece not having a big bold title to show whereabouts we are with this thing. Please fix that and it will be PERFECT! I assume it was there originally and then Lister stuffed it in his filthy back passage? Shame on him. I’ll add my notes in a little bit too. P.S Dave Lister MUST be cancelled!
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 11, 2022 14:30:58 GMT
Thanks for adding that Underdunn, now I am happy. I’m sorry you had to retrieve it from Lister’s filthy anus, but it’s done now and we can all move on and heal. Soooo here’s MY thoughts on this episode: Lister happily rides his stupid toddler bike around, which he has no doubt told everyone is his “pussy wagon” because that’s the sort of guy Dave is. The seat of that bike is likely to be referred to by him as “the backseat”, a place he would happily take some poor woman on a date, if there was any on board, which there isn’t yet but someone should let down the tires anyway as a precaution. Lister is correctly served trash by the vending machine. When even a machine knows what you’re all about, you should take notice. But obviously Dave does not. Because he has no self awareness or concern for anything other than whatever he feels like doing right now. Lister has a picture of himself posing like a bellend with a basketball player and tells Cat that this guy was pleased to see him. Dubious! He then smugs off to Cat about how his grandmother went storming into school to kick off when he was failing, because Lister believes everyone who rightfully points out that he’s a lazy entitled idiot deserves to be assaulted. Why promote violence in this way, Dave? Also why did you get an old lady to fight your battles for you anyway? You’re a weak man Dave. A weak man. Lister tries to molest a goldfish. When the goldfish isn’t responsive, he starts smacking it about, in exactly the same style as he’s probably treated various unconscious women/animals. It’s ok though. It’s a robot fish! That’s right guys - Dave is now using robots that resemble actual living creatures for his pleasure. I suppose it means he leaves actual living creatures alone for a change, but still this is questionable behaviour. Would we be ok with someone building realistic dog robots for this purpose? Or would we believe they had likely already tried it with an actual dog and be concerned for the safety of all dogs in the area? You know the answer to this. Lister casually outs Rimmer as gay because of his haircut. Imagine if having a traditionally female haircut automatically made you gay? Lister is a massive homophobe. Why the HELL hasn’t he been cancelled yet?! Lister tells a dead man to man up cos he’s sad that he’s dead. Lister selfishly wants to put himself into stasis again so he can go back to earth and have his wicked way with whoever and whatever he pleases. Ffs. Lister announces he’s going to G&T, then he’s seen doing a questionable grooming/hygiene routine that will do nothing for the stench. Oh. The. IRONY hahahaha Oh no, is that TWO Dave Listers? Or just his reflection, also sick of his nonsense and abandoning him like everyone else wants to? It’s neither, but both would be believeable. Lister can’t understand why Cat would want to bring spare clothes anywhere. Lister doesn’t change his clothes very often and his underwear even less. I bet he wouldn’t be above patching some knees on a crusty old £3 pair of Tesco value tracksuit bottoms and hitting the town. Rimmer is lucky to be dead, so he can’t breathe in the Lister fumes and cats will happily poke about in feces anyway, so the BO probably doesn’t bother him too much. A toaster politely answers Dave’s dumb question, so he calls it names. I understand it’s hard for a guy to realise he has a lower IQ than a toaster, but there’s no need to abuse those who are just trying to help. Lister doesn’t grasp that slinging his dong all over the place without using protection often ends in pregnancy. A big red flag. A huge one. Lister tells the skutters (who couldn’t give a crap) that he hopes dolphins have taken over earth. Well that’s hardly surprising, because dolphins are the rapiest creatures ever! It’s not even a joke - the males gang rape the females in mating season and will even happily bone indiscriminately outside of their species, including and ESPECIALLY human women on their periods. Look it up if you don’t believe me, there’s videos. Lister has definitely jacked off to every single one of those videos many times over. Lister talks about all the things he’s never done. Eating a greasy prawn curry is his top priority. Reading a book comes after that. Then having a family last. Not content with already rating that as bottom of his list, he then makes “having a family” all about having a lot of sex, with suspiciously no mention of if that sex would be consensual or not. Gross. Holly is suitably uninterested in the situation that may result in the destruction of Dave Lister. Sadly Dave survives, but it was good to see Cat throw him to the ground, where he deserves to be at all times. Elderly Lister is just as scummy as young Lister. Lister is completely unmoved by learning about the death of his son. He almost seems excited for it. Because all he cares about is boasting to Rimmer about how his sperm that he’s always firing at unsuspecting people/creatures/inanimate objects has somehow landed in the right place, producing life. But he can’t be bothered with the responsibility beyond letting everyone know this and therefore doesn’t care that one of his kids dies, cos it means he will get to have sex again for that kid to ever even exist. Wow. That’s pretty low even for you Dave. Is this not enough evidence of the TOXIC behaviour of Dave Lister? Are tordfc gonna continue to defend the honour of a man who can’t keep it in his skid marked undergarments? Well probably actually. But everyone else MUST cancel Dave Lister, before it’s too late.
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Post by johnsballs on Mar 16, 2022 15:58:45 GMT
does the incident with the ballgirl in series 6 count? sorry if i'm skipping too far ahead!!
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 16, 2022 17:05:22 GMT
does the incident with the ballgirl in series 6 count? sorry if i'm skipping too far ahead!! Yeah it all counts. Not at series 6 yet, but when we are I’m sure it will come up.
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Post by Nikki the Great on Mar 16, 2022 17:08:59 GMT
P.S johnsballs are you excited for the big changes? P.S who are you again?
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Post by johnsballs on Mar 17, 2022 16:00:16 GMT
just an old lurker from the old forum!
changes sound exciting!
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